Sunday, December 06, 2015

Trump, the musical

(Updated*) As I caught myself humming the Nazi crowd-raiser Tomorrow Belongs to Me from Cabaret a bit back, it occurred to me that Trump needs an anthem. Since he's promising restoration, what better template than Happy Days are Here Again?  So here goes:

Barbarians at the gate again!
To make America great again
we've got to learn how to hate again --
make America great again.

America's losing all the time!
We can win by hurling lots of slime,
and committing every known war crime,
we are losing all the time.

To make America win again
we'll renew our original sin again,
put the Bill of Rights on spin again,
make America win again.

To make America pure again
we've got to slam shut the door again,
and all p.c. thoughts ignore again,
make America pure again.

To make America best again
we need a religious test my friend
so we know who to detest again,
make America best again.

To make America strong again
it's "my country right or wrong again" --
speak loud and wave our schlong again,
make America strong again.

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* At suggestion of Mara the librarian on Twitter, I've pared this to four lines per stanza, in keeping with the song.

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